Yes, its was Mum's birthday on Sunday (born 26/07/1929), and seeing as it was definately an occasion for a camera, I have a few pics to share. But let me give a bit of a health update first. Mum is going OK. Not great . . . but OK. She has been battling with "a touch of" (doctor's words) the flu for the past few weeks, and so has not been eating that well, has been feeling weak and achey, and has been using more oxygen than usual. Apart from that, she still managed to get to play bridge last Thursday morning, so it's not been a particularly debilitating back-slide.
But before we get to the birthday, one visit definately worth mentioning was from all the Adler (pre-marriage) sisters on their yearly get-together. They all came for morning tea last Friday (24/07) and filled the unit with their warm & uplifting energy . . . and matching bags (made especially for their get-together by Sue). Mum enjoyed the visit enormously :)
Then, of course, Sunday was Mum's birthday, and we had a lovely lunch at the International Club in Atherton to celebrate. Joining Mum & I were Phil, Shelly, Harley, Simon, Alison, and Alison's sister Doris, who was over for a few weeks from WA.
The food was great, the atmosphere pretty quiet & relaxing, and the cake was Mum's favourite . . . a black forest cake . . . but it was so big we gave a quarter of it to the kitchen staff before we left.
Something else worth sharing is that Mum actually bought herself a birthday present! Partly due to some unofficial advice from a Centrelink worker who pointed out that she was over some cut-off point but would get a full pension if she had a little less cash in the bank, and partly due to the fact that she had didn't really like the Barina (she says she always thought it was a bit "tinny", but I suspect that some of that attitude may be due to Dad buying it without consulting her). Whatever the reason, it was lovely for me to see her feeling deserving of a gift of this magnitude from herself, and I, too, feel blessed, because, as the chauffer, I was able to express a preference for, and get, the "5 on the floor" manual version of the latest Mitsubishi Lancer :)
As usual, the lack of news in the form of Blog updates, has meant good news, but there are a few things to share with everyone. We did have a bit of a scare the week before last, with Mum getting a terrible pain in her stomach at midnight on Wednesday night (20th May). Hotpacks didn't help, and she was unable to get back to sleep. Bruce Herriot (her Doctor) was called around 6.30 a.m. and he gave her a shot of pethadene so she could relax and sleep, and she had blood tests done. Bruce called in several times that day and by the time the blood test results had given her the all-clear from anything serious in the late afternoon, the pain had started to move down, suggesting it was a blockage in her digestive system. An enema got things going again, followed by a laxative Thursday night, and she was back to full steam again on Friday :)
So, apart form that one day, she has been going from strength to strength. She has started playing bridge again on a Thursday when needed, and has just come through a very busy few days of catching up with old friends and new, culminating in a Herberton High School Reunion at George & Lorna Jackson's place.
We had her friends (above), who had come up for the above-mentioned Reunion as well as the Yungaburra Primary School Reunion (which Mum chose not to go to), Audry & John Dickie, Ailsa Scurr, and Moira Martin for lunch last Monday (25th), then lunch out with them again (minus John, who was not well) at the Tolga hotel on Wednesday (27th). The very next day after that we had more of Mum's friends, Neville and Sue See, for lunch, and then on Saturday just gone (30th), we went to a baby shower for some friends of mine, Andre & Nina. Yep, I was suprised Mum came with me to that, even though she had met them and they had invited her, and she was not the oldest person there as she had feared anyway. She said she enjoyed the afternoon, but only stayed for an hour and a half :)
Then on Sunday (whew, see what I mean about a busy time LOL!), she had the best time of the lot at the Herberton High School Reunion (below). It was at George & Lorna Jackson's place and she and all the olther old school chums seemed to have a wonderful time catching up with all the latest news.
And just to finish off the day, I showed Mum the video below (that several people have sent me the link to) which resulted in tears rolling down her face, and her exclaiming that it was the joy coming out. I had some joy coming out myself LOL! It definately is a feel good video, and It would have been amazing to have been there at the time . . . enjoy!
I have been wanting to do a blog update for several weeks now, and even though it's been ages since the last update (I think I have set a new record for length of time between updates LOL!), it has, thankfully, been a case of "no news being good news" for us. But . . . Easter feels like a good time to "break the drought" and write a few words to let you know how we are going, as well as send out some warm Easter greetings to you :) You will notice that I actually submitted this update several days after Easter, and that's because a little program (Ad Muncher) I have to get rid of ads from web pages worked a bit too brilliantly, and was causing the Blogger website to malfunction . . . it just took me a few days to realize what the problem was :(
Mum has had a few small health issues over the past weeks, with having two sunspots burned (frozen???) off her nose last week, but generally is going really well. After her last medical checkup, she was taken off the three valium (2mg) she was having each day to help her relax, and she handled that change easily. She still cries quite readily when she becomes acutely aware of Dad's absence in her life, but she seems to be getting more and more comfortable with that and accepting that its a natural (and essential) part of the grieving process. There are still times, however, where I pick her up for slipping back into her old ways of swallowing them down and/or apologising to whoever is with her for her tears, as if she was doing something wrong LOL! Where on earth does that attitude come from? No doubt from the people who showed her how to BE in the world as a child, and I guess they were doing their best, but I sincerely thank God she is letting go of those rediculous and innappropriate attitudes now :)
March 22nd was Dad and Mum's wedding anniversary, and even though they are not both still here to celebrate one more year of marriage since the last, I reckon it's a day that will always be worth celebrating (I wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for that day LOL!), and so I took Mum to The Coffee Works in Mareeba for morning tea to do just that. They also produce delicious hand-crafted chocolates there, so it was the ideal time to get Mum a very special Easter Egg, below :)
Easter has been quite a social time, with Simon (my nephew, Mum's grandson) visiting Thursday night with his friend Tracey to play board games, a lunch of fish (and a feast of delicious local dishes) at the farm (Phil's place) on Good Friday, and another visit from Simon and Tracey for afternoon yesterday (Easter Sunday), after which us three young ones (not sure if I should still be included in that LOL!) had an e-game (on my computer) of Cashflow 101. I must say that for their first game Simon and Tracey did really well, though I got out of the rat-race (the main object of the game) first after a lucky break buying and selling shares.
Well . . . thats all for now, so before I think of anything else to add (and there's probably heaps LOL!), I'll sign off and get this update online :)
It was wonderful to see the Atherton Uniting Church filled to overflowing last Monday (19th January) as we celebrated Max's life and said goodbye (to his physical form, anyway). Leo Newell, the minister of the church, had helped us create the program, and conducted it beautifully. Songs were sung, prayers were prayed, and many of the ways that Dad had touched people's lives were shared by family and friends. We even screened a powerpoint presentation * of snapshots of his life with him singing The Stars * as the soundtrack. My brother Phil created that, and he even wrote the song, too! Dad's three sons (Pete, Phil, and I), and three of his grandsons (Simon, Nick, and Harley) were very honoured pallbearers.
(* Please note . . . if you want to run the powerpoint presentation along with The Stars soundtrack, you will need to download both files [links above] and place them in the same folder before running it.)
When I got up to say my bit, as well as reading out some words that Dad's brother Geoff had sent, I also read out a poem that I had written for the occasion called "Celebrating Dad". It evoked many feelings in myself and others on the day and I would like to include it in this update as a tribute to him . . .
CELEBRATING DAD
Hi there Dad. I know you’re here. So “Au Revoir”, I say ‘cause I know I’ll see you again; you’re just a breath away We’ve all come here to pay respect, and celebrate your life Your kids, and grandkids, siblings, friends, and your beloved wife
You really touched so many lives while you walked on this earth And I know I am one of those that celebrate your birth They say nobody’s perfect, Dad, but I have come to see You’ve always only ever been the perfect Dad for me
Providing for your family was a goal you set to do And all we ever wanted more of was some time with you I am so proud to be your son, and grateful, through and through You helped me learn so many things as I grew up with you
How to kick a football, how to bat and bowl How to drive a nail in, and how to dig a hole How to ski behind a boat, and how to sail one too All these things and so much more, I learned because of you
But you know what Dad the greatest gift that you bestowed on me Was a drive to seek and find the truth, and to always be An instrument of love and peace to everyone you knew So thanks dear Dad, may all that love and peace now be with you
In conclusion, I thought it'd be good to let you know that Mum is going amazingly well. As you can imagine, she is missing Dad heaps, but she is able to express her sadness pretty well as it arises. We have spoken a lot about the grieving process, something I have learned a great deal about on my journey to date, and she seems to be willing and able to embrace it, as uncomfortable as it is. She had blood tests done on Wednesday, and her doctor came and saw her yesterday (Thursday 23rd) with the results. She passed everything with flying colours! And because her foot is healed of its ulcers, and she is no longer in any pain, he dropped her pain patch down one level to the lowest level there is. So . . . all the love you have been sending has definately been working :) It is soooooo appreciated . . . thank you soooooo much :)
A sombre update today, folks, as Dad (Max) left his body around 11:45 yesterday morning. He also left behind the pain he was in and is suffering no more. The French say Au Revoir as a more formal version of "see you later", and thats seems totally appropriate to me here, due to my belief that the essence of who we are is much much greater than the body we inhabited while we were living here in three dimensional reality.
He will always be as close as a thought because the love that he is (and we all are) can never die. Still, his pyhsical presence, especially for Mum, is a huge loss, and needs to be grieved. I do believe that she will be able to navigate through that difficult process, because she has quite good access to her feelings, and she is certainly being encouraged and supported in embracing it by me . . . but any love and support YOU can send her way will be very much appreciated.
This is not going to be a long update, but I was very pleased to find a couple of moving and uplifting videos online that I wanted to share with you at this time. The first is "To Where You Are", by Josh Groban, but sung here by Chloe Agnew, and although it's not definate yet, Mum would like this song to be played at the funeral, which, incidentally, is going to be held at 2.00p.m. next Monday (18th) at the Atherton Uniting Church.
The second is a beautiful song called "Love Is Eternal", and although it's not my favourite version of the song, Carly Simon does an excellent job of it, and I was suprised to even find a video of it at all . . . enjoy :)
